Originally from South Korea, I came to Australia to study in an Australian university. After graduation, I found a government job in NSW, and settled down in Australia.
Until my early 30s, I was an atheist who never believed in anything spiritual. I was just a very typical normal person who got some education, got a decent job, got married, bought a house, and was planning to have an easy and comfortable retirement by working and saving hard.
Then, suddenly, out-of-the-blue, and seemingly beyond my will and intention, I had what I can only describe as an experience of spiritual awakening with spontaneous knowing. I had hardly any knowledge about spirituality at that point, so, these awakening experiences were shocking, disturbing, and confusing. I was distraught when I realised that I could never go back to the normal life that I had before I had these experiences. I ended up losing literally everything through the process of spiritual awakening – family, job, money, friends and my marriage.
Some people might say that I was lucky to have any kind of experience of spiritual awakening, and that I should see it as a gift from above. Many spiritual people do try so hard for many years to experience awakening, but I didn’t want it – I never once wished to have it myself.
Several very difficult and agonising years followed these early experiences as I went through a process of letting go of my old self to embrace my new self - it involved letting go of everything that I had. During this time, I ended up long term backpacking, doing two around the world trips over a period of 4 years, and on a few occasions I nearly killed myself.
Eventually I realised that I needed time, and the willingness to undergo a lot of different learning processes, to really comprehend these spontaneous ‘knowings’, even though they were ultimately only an opening into what was already within me. It’s now been 12 years since I experienced the first spiritual awakening, and I now feel spiritually comfortable, settled and confident enough that I’d like to be able to help people who might be going through similar things to what I went through spiritually.
Everybody’s path is unique and different, even though they eventually lead to the same realisations. My spiritual awakening was not an easy one due to my strong egoic resistance which, for a long time, I struggled to surrender and let go of, but for some people this might come a lot easier.
Also, my spiritual awakening involved a process of heart opening through which I came to know a love that seemed to be beyond human love, including experiences of “no-self”, and spontaneous realisations. Others might have different spiritual experiences through the awakening process. For me, it was a very lonely journey, but very worthwhile in the end, and I hope to be able to help others to make it easier for them.
Given everything I’ve said above, you may wonder if, given the choice, would I prefer to go back to where I was before and become someone who doesn’t know anything about spirituality? Hmm… That’s a good question, haha. We can be perfectly ok with our lives without knowing what I know now, as I felt I was ok before. After awakening experiences, you suddenly start seeing many things that you never saw before, and this can be both pleasant and unpleasant. I’m not always sure about what might be my choice. But one thing that is very certain about me after awakening, is that any kind of ‘fear’ is hardly there for me now, bringing a nice peaceful mind and a more relaxed attitude towards life in every aspect, because I know now that everything is ok, always.